Why I don't teach lucid dreaming (at least, not yet)

“Are we going to learn about lucid dreaming in this class?” as student asks at the start of a dreamwork series.

This question often arises from new students in the first or second session of my dreamwork classes, regardless of the theme of the class. When I give my answer, I see a mix of relieved nods and skeptically raised eyebrows move through the group.

Although lucid dreaming—the practice of becoming aware that you’re dreaming while you’re dreaming, often with the intention to control the narrative of the dream—is an increasingly popular modality, I don’t currently teach it. Here are the top five reasons why:

1. People raised in Westernized, industrialized cultures love the illusion that we’re in control. Dreamwork students often arrive with the idea that if they can learn to “wake up” while dreaming, they’ll have what amounts to infinite power; they’ll be able to fly, breathe under water, vanquish demons, host orgies, eat all the cake they want without a care for calories, or travel to distant lands without buying an airline ticket or contributing to carbon emissions. All of these ideas are ostensibly great. Who wouldn’t want that type of control? Who wouldn’t want that kind of relief from the strains of everyday life?

The problem, of course, is that we’re not really in control. Every existing lucid dreaming tradition has tales of the lucid dream turning on the dreamer. An apparent “cast member” in the show of the dream suddenly demands attention. An apparent ally turns hostile. A dreamer gets locked in an endless cycle of dreamscape after dreamscape, believing themselves to have woken up only to find that, yet again, they are in a deeper layer of dream.

This is not a game. You are not God. The Dreammaker is making the dream. Much the way Westernized and industrialized culture approaches nature as if we could add or remove elements without thought of consequence, and approaches meditation as if it were a stress-management technique rather than a self-realization practice, students often approach lucid dreaming as if the Dream World were a playground laid out for their own exclusive use. They approach as if the Dream World were not real, as if it were not sentient, as if it did not have its own agenda, its own message for you, its own rules.

I suppose you could call this an animist viewpoint; I recognize a sentient world, and I believe the source of this sentience abides in Dreamland as well, and therefore I believe that I am in Dreamland as a guest and that I should behave with respect. Take off my shoes at the door, bring a gift, don’t overstay my welcome. I have no need to design my experience in an environment that offers me countless marvels already, and I don’t teach other people to do this, either.

2. People often, very understandably, want to stop having nightmares. They want to make things pleasant, or at least less scary. I have a lot of compassion for this perspective, but I believe it misses the point. If the dream is showing you something scary, it wants you to see something scary. The old adage, “face the monster,” is fundamentally true, though true dreamwork often requires more nuance.

I cannot tell you how many times I’ve had a terrifying nightmare only to work on the dream by the light of day and discover that not only is it not scary, it’s actually existentially hilarious. I rarely have the same nightmare twice anymore, and if I do I know it’s because I’m ignoring something. Modern, westernized culture loves to ignore what makes us uncomfortable. We refuse to acknowledge death, aging, and ecological collapse. Why would we be any different with nightmares?

But, to live a full life, you must skate alongside death, you must age every moment from the time you are born, you must learn from wise elders, and you must care for the Earth as the living Being that She is. Likewise, you must acknowledge that the dreamscape contains nightmares as well as ecstatic, healing, mundane and delightful dreams. This is the full package. The dark and the light contain each other. If you can work with, and even welcome, the nightmares, you no longer have to BE afraid, even if you have moments of fear.

That being said, there are people who live with chronic nightmares, sometimes multiple nightmares per night for years on end. If you have this type of problem, I first recommend getting checked out by a sleep specialist. If you’re struggling to get into deep stages of sleep; if you have diagnosed or undiagnosed PTSD; if you’re taking certain medications, such as hormones or Alzheimers medications; or if you’re experiencing one of many other neurological and medical factors, it’s still wise to work with nightmares from a spiritual and psychological framework, but not only—please seek medical advice as well. The beauty of working from all directions—the medical and the spiritual and psychological—is that the solution often emerges from the middle, with each avenue informing the other and forming a more complete experience of growth, resolution, and healing.

3. Most people lack basic dreamwork skills. If don’t know how to interact with the non-lucid dreams you have, why would you complicate that situation by an order of magnitude? The average modern person doesn’t know much, if anything, about how to recall, analyze, and dialog with their existing dream process. Why jump to controlling something you don’t yet understand? Build the foundation first.

4. It’s simply not my practice. Many years ago, I dedicated some intensive time to learning the art of lucid dreaming and discovered that every time I became aware that I was dreaming, the dream turned into a nightmare. At first I thought there was something wrong with my practice, but over time I realized that The Dreaming was warning me; don’t play here. It's not the right time. I already had a very well-developed dream life full of clarity, nuance, strong recall, and a back-and-forth dialogue between myself and the Dreammaker. I took these nightmares as a signal that Dreamland had a boundary, and I honored it.

I have never felt that I was missing out on anything and I have never felt compelled to return to lucid dreaming as an intentional practice. Occasionally, I have a lucid dream anyway. I simply wake up in a dream and realize I’m dreaming. That’s fun and a very cool experience! I don’t make it happen, it just happens. Many people have this experience. Some people report consistently lucid dreaming since childhood. If that’s you, that’s great! If you naturally wake up during your dreaming, if you can play and fly and visit faraway lands on purpose and you’re not forcing that experience, by all means, enjoy yourself. Just remember to make the most of this gift and go deeper with your dreamwork.

5. Lucid dreaming is a well-established practice in many traditions, and I do not take this lightly. While cultures around the world have some version of spiritual lucid dreamwork, the Tibetans are most well-known for depth and specificity in this realm, the purpose of which is singular: wake up. Not “wake up” out of nighttime sleep, but wake up out of suffering. Become enlightened. If you’re fortunate enough to wake up in your sleep, there are techniques for meditating in a lucid dreaming state with even greater depth and clarity than in your waking life. This is not a practice for beginners. I am not a Tibetan Lama practiced in this art, and so I do not teach this. If you are drawn to this art, find a teacher who teaches this and dedicate your life to it.

All of that being said, it may happen some day that lucid dreaming becomes and intentional part of my personal practice. It may then evolve into something I teach. I am open to that if the Dreammaker has that in mind, but all of the above still applies. Basic dreamwork is foundational, I am not seeking the illusion of control or the escape of discomfort, I honor established dreamwork traditions, and I practice what I preach.

If you would like a basic introduction to the foundations of personal dreamwork, this course is a great primer.